Running for the weak-willed and impulsive

00:30: Huh. This is new and not necessarily unpleasant.

01:00: I’m running. Hey, man with dog. Hello, boy with balloon. Excuse me, everyone, but I am much faster than your current pace.

01:10: Ah, a fellow runner. Better speed up so they know we’re in this together.

01:15: Annnnd they’re gone.

01:45: Why do I walk? I’ll never be late again! Pro-tip.

02:00: Maybe this is my thing. THIS. I’m a gazelle, bambi- the latter years. EYE OF THE TIGER. I’m gonna run up steps. In your face, river.

02:15: MNH…thrill…UG…GH...fight….MN…

02:35: Walkers. Many walkers. Must not stop. For god’s sake, don’t breathe like a dragon.

02:45: Yeah, this is slow-motion running. For stretching. And zombies. See that? Precision + exercise= exercision.

03:00: Oh hi, strolling family. I’m fine- just cooling down. The pavement is cooler, you see.

1 hour later: Maybe I’m a gymnast. I mean, how do I know I can’t somersault?